Since my last post, my parents and I had a discussion about my views on gay marriage, and the possibility that I might do what is natural for me, get married to a man. my mom told me that no matter what I believe that if I did get a same sex marriage that I would not feel the spirit as strongly and that when I die I would be judged for disobeying the prophet. I know my mom loves me but to be honest to hear that hurt, it also made me doubt the feelings of peace I had received when I prayed to the Lord and expressed my knowledge of gay marriage as being good.
so after this discussion I was in turmoil once again over what is right, and what is wrong. So as I always do when I am in turmoil over this subject I would try and imagine a happy relationship with a woman, and try and make myself think that I could learn to be attracted to a woman and be happy with her. After doing this for a while I said to myself "I can't believe I am still trying to change," I have been doing this for years and about a few months ago I realized that I would never change and finally accepted myself and the happiness that gay marriage can bring. but every once and a while I go back in to turmoil and I am always unhappy when that happens.
The Gift of Faith
4 weeks ago